【第一題】
In appreciation of the snow scene he suddenly caught sight of the bent cypress, lie grumbled to himself. "The gardeners were indeed very negligent. They didn't even come out to patrol the campus in such a heavy snow as last night's. They should he held partially responsible for the ruin of the harmonious beauty of nature." The amateur artist was staring at the bent cypress when inspiration flashed into his mind. He quickly opened his sketch book and drew an outline of the cypress with his charcoal pen. He planned to develop the sketch into a cartoon, when he got back to the dormitory. He had even figured out a title for it, "A Cypress Complains.” He left with a sigh of sympathy for the bent tree and a flicker o# disappointment in his eyes.
In the dim sunlight, a young worker, with a worst bag on his shoulder, was hurrying to the Chinese Department to audit a selective course. All of a sudden a gust of wind blew over the bent cypress, shaking the overlaying snowflakes down onto the young man's head and shoulders. He looked up and noticed the tree. Then he slowed his steps, took a glance at his watch and hurried away.
In a short while, he came back with a spade, an old bamboo stick and a piece of rubber hand. He worked with his deft hands on the bent cypress, until it was straight again. The bell for class was ringing and he dashed to the classroom.
Silence reigned. Faint bluish footprints, of all shapes and sizes, farmed in the snow lines of illegible words with subtle implications. That cypress was quietly gazing at the snow, as if meditating on the mystery of beauty.
參考譯文
他在欣賞雪景之餘，猛然發現傾斜的龍柏，不滿地輕聲嘀咕：“搞環境保護的同志真馬虎，昨晚下那麼大的雪，竟沒來校園巡視，他們對美的統一性的被破壞負有間接的責任!”這位美術愛好者凝視片刻，靈感的火花映亮心窗，他立刻開啟速寫本，涅著炭精棒，勾勒這棵龍柏的體態輪廓，準備回宿舍精心畫一幅漫畫，連畫名也想好了，就叫做：《一株龍柏的控訴》。他離去時遺憾地搖頭嘆息，眼波里顫動著一絲失望的情緒。
微弱的陽光下，急匆匆地走來一個肩挎舊書包的青年工人，他是來旁聽中文系選修課的。突然，一陣風吹拂龍柏樹，揚起無數雪沫，灑在他頭上、身上。青年工人仰臉看看那株龍柏.腳步放慢了，他一看手錶立刻加快步伐走去。
一會，他帶來一把鐵鍬、一截舊茅竹、橡皮帶，手腳麻利地不停地勞作，那株傾斜的龍柏終於挺直了脊樑，牢牢地屹立在校園。
上課鈴聲響了。他疾步如飛地向教室奔去!
靜謐。點點不同的淺藍色腳印留在雪地裡，組合成一行行無人辨識的文字，蘊藏著精緻微妙的內涵。那株龍柏靜靜注視著面前的雪地，彷彿苦心思索關於美的神祕的.定義。
【第二題】
A Case of Eloquence
A doctor once told me about one of his outpatients who suffered from the disease of eloquence:
"Please sit down," the doctor told him.
"Why should I?" the patient asked. "Are you going to deprive me of my right not to sit down?"
The doctor could say nothing but offered him a glass of water. "Have some water then.”
The patient retorted, “This is lop-sided talk, so it is absurd. Not all water is drinkable. If you put same potassium cyanide in it, it will be undrinkable. "
The doctor said, "1 didn't put any poison in it. Please rest assured."
"Who said you put poison in it? Do you mean to say that 1 am lodging a false accusation against you? Has it been written cat the indictment of the procurator that you have put poison in the water? I didn't say you had put poison in it, but you claimed that I said you had put poison in it. So you have indeed put in move poisonous poison against met"
The doctor could not but heave a sigh and switched to another topic, “It's fine today.”
The patient replied, "Nonsense! The fact that it is fine here doesn't mean that it is fine everywhere else in the world. At the North Pole, for example, it must be freezing, with strong winds, long nights and icebergs colliding with one another. . . "
The doctor couldn't help but retorted, "Ibis is not the North Pole."
The patient argued, “You can't deny the existence of the North Pole. If you do, you'll be distorting facts with ulterior motives."
Finally the doctor begged him, "Please go away."
The patient again answered back. "You have no right to order me to leave. Yours is a hospital, not a public security office. So you can't arrest me, nor shoot me to death. "
An investigation revealed the fact that this patient had joined the so-called “Lung Xiao” (An organization doing the Cultural Revolution that wrote the major articles which voiced the opinions of the Gang of Four. Here "Xiao" also implies "Loyalty to the Gang of Four.") writing group. What he was suffering from may have been the after-effects of that period.
雄辯症
一位醫生向我介紹，他們在門診中接觸了
一位雄辯症病人。醫生說：“請坐。”
病人說：“為什麼要坐呢?難道你要剝奪我的不坐權嗎?”
醫生無可奈何，倒了一杯水，說：“請喝水吧。”
病人說：“這樣談問題是片面的，因而是荒謬的，並不是所有的水都能喝。例如你如果在水裡攙上毒，就絕對不能喝。”
醫生說：“我這裡並沒有放毒藥嘛。你放心! ”
病人說：“誰說你放了毒藥了呢?難道我誣告你放了毒藥?難道檢察院起訴書上說你放了毒藥?我沒說你放毒藥，而你說我說你放了毒藥，你這才是放了比毒藥還毒的毒藥!”
醫生毫無辦法，便嘆了口氣，換一個話題說：“今天天氣不錯。”
病人說：“純粹胡說八道!你這裡天氣不錯，並不等於全世界在今天都是好天氣。例如北極，今天天氣就很壞，颳著大風，漫漫長夜，冰山正在撞擊……”
醫生忍不住反駁說：“我們這裡並不是北極嘛。”
病人說：“但你不應該否認北極的存在。你否認北極的存在，就是歪曲事實真相，就是別有用心。”
醫生說:“你走吧。”
病人說：“你無權命令我走。你是醫院.不是公安機關，你不可能逮捕我，你不可能槍斃我。”
……經過多方調查，才知道病人當年參加過“樑效”的寫作班子，估計可能是一種後遺症。
